The Early Days

When I first decided to get Simba, it was a decision that was unplanned, spontaneous, and completely out of character for me. There was little thought put into what type of situation I would be in years from now, all I wanted was to have a puppy of my own. The day I went to pick my puppy, the one I had initially wanted had no desire to have anything to do with me. I picked Simba because he came up to me, and was the only puppy to really notice me and wanted to interact with me.

Thus, our story begins.

Two hearts - one pair

Being a part of Simba’s life gave me so much more than I could have ever imagined. When people think of owning a dog, the usual thoughts of feeding, walking, occasional play come to mind. For us, we are a team, a partnership, and friends to the end of the world. As cliché has it sounds, I learned so much about myself through our time together. I wanted to provide for him the same way all moms do for their kids.

I think about our time together, and I honestly do not know what to feel. Part of me is so blessed to have had him for the time that I did, but the other part of me is broken and devastated that he went on to his second life so soon.

The Wise Man

There is a saying I have seen on the internet that says the reason dogs leave us so soon is because they already know how to love us, and they have taught us everything we need to know. I believe Simba is far wiser than I ever gave him credit for. Simba taught me determination, dedication, the power of faith in myself and positive thinking, and most importantly, he taught me how to live. I was his student, and like all students, there was one lesson I did not want to learn, but I did not have a choice.

The things we leave behind

When he left, I was left to deal with feelings of guilt, loss, depression, and overall a lack of life in my physical being. Without the support of friends and people close to me, I would have never been able to make strides towards acceptance.

Questions, Questions, Questions

The biggest fear in my life with Simba was him leaving too soon because of his illness, and when that time came, what would I do?

Would I be selfish and let him live to spare myself the pain...?

Would I ignore the advice of his doctors...?

Peace.

I realized through the experience with Simba, I wanted nothing more than for him to be happy and at peace, even if it meant we couldn’t be together anymore.

I let him move on to this second life, and thus my last lesson of independence and acceptance began.

"Finishing"

I can’t say that I’ve “finished” the lesson or even come close to coming to terms with my life the way it is now. I have many days where I laugh, smile, and enjoy time with friends and those close to me. But I have my fair share of days where I miss him more than anything, and miss our times together.

Loss

Loss of any kind, whether it be human or a pet, is unbearable and an experience that is so subjective. My journey with Simba is the best experience of my life, I was so stressed, worried, upset, happy, grateful, and all the other feelings in between during our time together that I can’t think of another word to describe our relationship than soul mates.

On Being a Mom

Being Simba’s mom is the best job I have, and yes, the job of mom never ends, even when our kids have to leave to begin the next phase of their after lives. I miss him everyday, but I will never trade our time together.

To pup, with love

Simba, I miss you more than anything puppa. Hearing all about your adventures up there makes my day, and I know you’re probably up to no good, tearing up all your hedgehogs and losing your chuck it balls. Please know I try my hardest to not blame myself, and I know that my decision was the best for you.

My naughty boy, you have caused me so much stress, worry, and heartbreak in my life, but I would NEVER trade our time together for anything.  Thank you for never giving up, and making sure I didn’t lose hope along the way. You deserve every ounce of happiness up there. 

I love you so much, and can’t wait to see you again.

Please keep your hedgehog clean, 

<3 Mom